The Adventures of an MLS Away Fan, Part II

By: Michael | August 26th, 2007

The Adventures of an MLS Away Fan, Part II

Today’s Adventure: Getting to the stadium and finding out more people care about American football practices than European football games.

Because of the interlude suffered at the hands of the ineptitude of my ISP, those who have lost track of where the last adventure left off can visit this link. We’ll wait a minute while you get caught up.

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Ok, great. Welcome back. As my wife and I rolled into Foxborough, something struck me: here is a town that has been defined by an arena for as long as most residents have lived there, and yet there is not one advertisement up for New England Revolution soccer. There’s been an entire offseason without any Patriots football, but while billboard after billboard proudly display the oddly-shaped facsimile of a Massachusetts Minuteman that represents Tom Brady and co., there isn’t even a mention of the night’s game as we passed though the town and by the stadium. There is simply an empty parking lot, a lot of construction work, and some scattered instructions about how to park during a Patriots game. It appears that Foxborough is far from a soccer town.

Not letting the non-festive nature of our surroundings daunt us, we pulled into the End Zone Motor Inn. Quickly upon entering the lobby, one cannot help but notice the multitude of signs featuring scrawled black-sharpie-on-cheap-paper correction. Though sketchy, they effective passed along some good information for anyone traveling to Gillette Stadium who happens to visit their fine establishment:

1) The advertised continental breakfast is “coming soon”, a sign thought to be best taped to the front of the buck-twenty-five-for-a-cheap-tasting-instant-coffee machine.
2) Checkout time has been moved up to 10AM, an hour earlier than advertised online.
3) There are already four Patriot game-days in which not a (large, itchy, used-feeling) bed will be left unoccupied.

After verifying our reservation, I tried to make a little small talk with the hotel lobby clerk about how the MLS season helps their business. Let’s call this The Faux Beat Writer’s Interview Number One [cue trumpets].

KCWIZARDS.THEOFFSIDE.COM: So, has the MLS season been good for business?
ENDZONE MOTOR INN LOBBY CLERK: The what?
KCOff: The Revolution’s home games at Gillette stadium… Major League Soccer. Do you see a lot of fans come in for those games?
EZClerk: We do get a lot of business with sports fans… You said it’s soccer season right now?
KCOff: Yes. Actually it has been for a few months now.
EZClerk: Well, to be honest, I haven’t even really noticed. I’ve seen some soccer on TV though.
KCOff: You don’t say… well thanks…
EZClerk: Enjoy your stay.

Like I said, not a soccer town.

To move the story along, I’ll sum up the End Zone Motor Inn’s accommodations with the observation that the rooms must have been really great in 1989. And why update something that’s so darn good?

Driving from the hotel to the stadium takes a total of two seconds or so (if nothing else, the EZMI certainly has location), which is also how long it takes to find a parking spot to an MLS game in New England. Despite the row upon row of empty parking spots, six men paid to apathetically waive flashlights point us to our destined spot. As I got out of the car, I was determined to remember the location of the car until I noticed the handy eleventy-billion-spots-per-letter-of-the-alphabet system Gillette Stadium boasts. Half the crowd and I all thought to ourselves: “OK, letter N. I’ll remember that.”

We walked up to the stadium, bought our tickets at the booth, and saw a large crowd gathering to our right – Huzzah, MLS fans! A short stroll down the side of the stadium, however, revealed the true nature of the excitement. On a field set down below the level of the parking lot and lined on side with bleachers, the Patriots were holding a practice session. While the gate to the soccer game stood empty, what seemed like over a hundred people all sat and watched the football players’ drills. They bought overpriced hot dogs and Powerade as if they were at a real game. They visited a tent and bought overpriced merchandise. They chatted about the upcoming season. They could care less about the Revolution, about David Beckham, about any soccer game that didn’t involve their offspring. And they represented exactly the kind of American who needs to be hooked on their MLS home team. How ironic that they sat in the shadow of the Revolution’s home field yet could not care less about anything happening that day past the training session of their football team!

After getting no help from a gaggle of security guards, finally someone told us that the opposite side of the stadium was where people entered for soccer games. A long, sweaty trudge down to the opposite corner revealed one of the two entrances to the game. To ensure we didn’t try anything funny, a very proud security guard with a white polo and too many gadgets around his belt led a team of orange polo-ed “guards” – most of them younger than I. My wife and I surveyed the scene, checked our watches, and sat on a rock… the website told us gates open two hours before, and I had hoped to get in early enough to try and catch a player or two warming up early with some questions.

WHITE POLO MAN: Can I help you two with something?
KCOFFSIDE.THEOFFSIDE.COM: No, thanks, we’re just waiting a few minutes until the gates open.
WPMan: Actually this is a soccer game, and we don’t open the gates until an hour before soccer games. Unless, that is, you would like to experience the “Soccer Celebration” – but it’s for kids. So you’d better come back in like an hour.
KCOff: Gillette’s official website says the gates open two hours before this game.
WPMan: Nope, sorry, this is a soccer game. We don’t open until an hour before.
KCOff: OK… we’ll just wait over on that rock again.
WPMan: Suit yourself.

Apparently it’s obvious that the spherical nature of the ball involved in tonight’s matchup meant there would be 60 fewer minutes to wander around the stadium.

Regardless, this is how my wife and I ended up being – correct me if you were sitting outside the other gate more than an hour before it opened on August 3rd – the first two fans to assemble outside of Gillette Stadium for the game. How the heck did we become the most dedicated fans this game had to offer?

Tune in Next Time for Part III, where we sit outside the gate and see ten identical conversations to the one above, finally get into the stadium, and occupy ourselves for 60 minutes of pregame nothingness.